The Ties That Bind

I have been constricted.  Or is it restricted?  Perhaps conflicted?

I am someone who likes to learn things on her own.  I want to seek knowledge, not be led to it.  I want to earn my opinion.  And create my situation.  I want nothing thrust upon me.  When that happens, I feel (constricted) (restricted) (conflicted) and I don’t handle it well.

I might lash out.  Or I might instantly (and for quite some time) recoil.

If you believe you are a square peg, you do square peg stuff.  If something causes those edges that make you a square to immediately be ground down so you become a round peg without your permission, through no personal choice, then it would seem only natural to have a push-back reaction, response.

Have you ever felt like you have invisible shackles?

If so, when you realized they were there, and that they had been for awhile as you reflect back, what did you do?  Did you quickly break them?  Expecting an immediate sense of relief or freedom?  Did it come?  Was it instantaneous?

Did the realization make them more apparent and thus feel like iron?  Maybe like a heavy weight upon your shoulders, not your wrists or ankles?

Did you need to think about it?  Like, well, hmmm….life was “this” way and I have been sort of living with the changes, yet also somewhat fighting them.  Do I really want to take that giant step to total freedom and shake myself free of these ties that bind?  Do I WANT to be free?  Or should I just keep on keepin’ on?

What will make me happiest?

Which person am I?  The square peg or the round peg?  Neither better than the other.  Sharing many similarities.  Yet, also, possessing small, yet significant differences.

For a number of years, I have been evolving.  Striving toward my best self.  Learning from my past and moving more wisely toward my future.  Becoming evermore me.  Speaking and living my truth.

I espouse living joyously, being one’s authentic self, grabbing up experiences and sharing in love & friendship.  Doing what brings you happiness.  Working and living with passion.  Radiating your light so that others can see the path.

While also knowing that I am shackled.

I am conflicted, which leaves me both constricted and restricted.

My next move is big for me and it will be soon, tho I cannot say when.  It will happen very organically, definitely unexpectedly, maybe (if I am lucky) with a total sense of relief, release and freedom.

Like achieving the next level in a video game!

For the record, I have never played Mario Bros. Atari, PacMan, Ms. PacMan and Space Invaders were my gaming days!

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